But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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