Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
