In the future we'll all be gay
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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