physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
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I wish they made helmets for livers.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
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I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.