we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
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I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
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I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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