You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
can u get pink eye on your cock?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
You took a bar mat shot.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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