OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize