paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
you had me at cake vodka
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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