she was so not down for the gang bang
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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