Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
