but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I have tasted many bathrooms
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize