I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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