The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
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