Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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