There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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