Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Randomize