their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
