I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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