this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I think people are normalizing furries
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
