Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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