two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I could fuck to npr.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Randomize