oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
fuck your aforementioned shoe
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal