So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
