We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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