My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
