it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
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