Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
