so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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