i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize