Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
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I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
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