we're blogging at a bar
You're my little dorito
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
