At least make sure they are 18
Why
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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