If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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