we're blogging at a bar
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
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