I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Randomize
