love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
