New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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