Plan B is the new Plan A
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
