What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
