Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize
