His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
