just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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