Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Randomize