thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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