she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
