I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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