I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
