Texts From Last Night

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  (207): View more from Maine

  We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.

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  (207): We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math. http://tfl.nu/vxcn
  Replies (85) Good night (1444) Bad night (467)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,

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  (203): these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them, http://tfl.nu/bifo
  Replies (13) Good night (819) Bad night (3386)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up

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  (828): You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up http://tfl.nu/y0oy
  Replies (27) Good night (5898) Bad night (731)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.

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  (410): she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love. http://tfl.nu/0ws2
  Replies (22) Good night (1197) Bad night (5678)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...

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  (507): She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart... http://tfl.nu/kgd9
  Replies (42) Good night (977) Bad night (12299)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional

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  (410): There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional http://tfl.nu/r1v2
  Replies (11) Good night (4581) Bad night (1294)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.

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  (908): My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated. http://tfl.nu/0c6p
  Replies (15) Good night (1055) Bad night (4298)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.

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  (989): I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study. http://tfl.nu/z59m
  Replies (5) Good night (789) Bad night (2580)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3

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  (850): Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3 http://tfl.nu/b5wj
  Replies (7) Good night (3278) Bad night (663)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.

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  (907): She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone. http://tfl.nu/lil1
  Replies (7) Good night (3635) Bad night (761)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?

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  (708): Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in? http://tfl.nu/sg75
  Replies (5) Good night (2064) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno

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  (617): If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno http://tfl.nu/05ob
  Replies (8) Good night (783) Bad night (408)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information

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  (716): That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information http://tfl.nu/q7xv
  Replies (3) Good night (894) Bad night (282)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.

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  (303): They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar. http://tfl.nu/u9wl
  Replies (2) Good night (277) Bad night (666)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  It's not too late to disappoint her you know...

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  (919): I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again (1-919): It's not too late to disappoint her you know... http://tfl.nu/57hn
  Replies (3) Good night (796) Bad night (224)

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