Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.

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(917): K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs. http://tfl.nu/lbd0

Replies (11) Good night (668) Bad night (1535)
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(859): View more from Kentucky

Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.

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(859): Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota. http://tfl.nu/azvw

Replies (14) Good night (2824) Bad night (751)
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(714): View more from California

So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him

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(714): So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him http://tfl.nu/b7ho

Replies (113) Good night (7982) Bad night (1295)
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(803): View more from South Carolina

so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.

(843): View more from South Carolina

drunk me is so punny.

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(803): so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life. (843): drunk me is so punny. http://tfl.nu/qdzv

Replies (19) Good night (8884) Bad night (1104)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..

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(860): He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time.. http://tfl.nu/k00f

Replies (8) Good night (5751) Bad night (1158)
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(410): View more from Maryland

you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma

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(410): you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma http://tfl.nu/40s8

Replies (9) Good night (1245) Bad night (3637)
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(703): View more from Virginia

I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.

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(703): I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend. http://tfl.nu/4wvr

Replies (9) Good night (3973) Bad night (1006)
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(+41): View more from Switzerland

She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"

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(+41): She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool" http://tfl.nu/0b6e

Replies (10) Good night (1610) Bad night (708)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.

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(715): I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE. http://tfl.nu/ipmq

Replies (6) Good night (978) Bad night (1167)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar

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(732): How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar http://tfl.nu/83wg

Replies (10) Good night (3098) Bad night (796)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat

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(978): Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat http://tfl.nu/tu1a

Replies (8) Good night (635) Bad night (317)
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(404): View more from Georgia

I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.

(843): View more from South Carolina

Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?

(404): View more from Georgia

I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.

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(404): I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight. (843): Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back? (404): I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me. http://tfl.nu/tm5b

Replies (2) Good night (420) Bad night (653)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?

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(570): I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night? http://tfl.nu/4cua

Replies (1) Good night (653) Bad night (271)
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(315): View more from New York

Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude

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(315): Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude http://tfl.nu/8w6o

Replies (1) Good night (602) Bad night (315)
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(517): View more from Michigan

Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.

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(517): Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil. http://tfl.nu/v2cg

Replies (4) Good night (392) Bad night (208)

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