This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
