I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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